S’up, Blogosphere?

S’up, blogosphere? First of all, let me apologize for my extended absence. I mean… seriously, Annie? You never write anymore. Everyone hates you. No one even cares anymore… loser.

Which I’m sure is partially true, but I have missed writing, so I think it’s best if I get back to it, you know?

So, let’s get caught up, shall we?

  • I returned yesterday from a visit with my Sister Who Lives Far Away. It was the first time I had flown since high school and pre 9/11. It was the first time I had flown all by myself. And even though I was a bit nervous, I discovered I LOVE flying. I get to sit there and READ and THINK and STARE OFF INTO SPACE and COLLECT MY THOUGHTS while someone else does all the work of getting me to my destination. It’s BRILLIANT. I never got to fly when I was married to the ass-hat. He was always, “But flying is so boring, you don’t get to see anything…” Which I found totally absurd because who wants to drive 15 to 20 hours to a destination and have to endure the torture of seeing nothing but farm fields through most of the central U.S.? That’s not fun. That’s mind-numbingly boring. So, it turns out, I love to fly. Especially with Delta. They give complimentary snacks… which is awesome. And even getting through security wasn’t that bad. The TSA agents were quite lovely, I have to say.
  • My dyed-in-the-wool protestant family are horrified to discover that I am curious about Catholicism and considering joining the Catholic church. Except, I haven’t admitted that to most of them… you know… because of the “horrified” part. Turns out, I love what I’ve seen about the Catholic church. I don’t know if I’ll actually join or not… but it’s on the agenda of things that need addressing.
  • Father McCutie is still as adorable as ever. The crush has not subsided. However, just so we’re clear, that is NOT why I’m considering joining the Catholic Church. It truly has nothing to do with him… or anyone else. He’s just cute, that’s all.  *sigh*
  • I still have not fully mourned my mother’s passing. I have zero feeling when it comes to that topic… and I don’t know why. It’s not like we had a bad relationship. In fact, it was just the opposite. That woman was my best friend and we were ridiculously close. And yet… nothing. No tears. No sobbing. No depression. It’s weird. My family is falling apart around me and I’m all… fine. I hate myself for that. I know people grieve in different ways, but it’s like after the funeral, I was all done. Who does that? I think I’m broken.
  • I’m still hopelessly in love with this job that pays me diddly-squat. I seriously have never been so happy in a job. It’s actually kind of gross and nauseating. I’m pretty sure people are sick of me talking about my kiddos and my school and my church… but honestly, if I wasn’t talking about that, I’d be talking about Winston and nobody wants to hear about my cat. Who is quite well, by the way. Thank you for asking.

ANNNNDDDD… I think that about covers it. For now. I’ll have more to write once school starts back up. Which I know you’re hopelessly excited about.

Holy crappers this was a boring post. What? It takes a while to get back into the swing of things. Give me a break, blogosphere. Give. Me. A break.



Things That Made Me Go, “Hmm…” – Week 40

Dearest readers,

Forgive my negligence in maintaining my regular blogging duties. My life has been a bit chaotic as of late and I have been unable to keep up with my regularly scheduled posts. (I really do need to make use of that “Schedule a Post” phenomenon…)

That being said, let me take the opportunity to be honest with you for a moment. Two significant things happened this week while preparing for this blog post (or rather, not preparing for this blog post…).

  1. I was not keeping up with the headlines seeing as I was trying to get settled into my new place and my new classroom. Headlines were the last things on my mind, so I was not consciously selecting articles for this week’s post.
  2. Nothing interesting happened this week. Literally nothing. At least I’m not aware of anything interesting happening this week. It could be because I wasn’t watching for it, but from the look’s of it, it was a pretty slow news week. When Donald Trump doesn’t throw a single hissy fit, you know it’s a slow week for news.

Therefore, we may be scraping the bottom of the barrel this week, thanks to the fact that EVERYONE ignored my Twitter plea to share interesting story ideas with me… Thanks, a lot, you mangy whores. (I don’t even know what that means, so don’t bother asking.)

Now, without further delay, here’s my very short list of things that made me go, “Hmm…” this week:

  • Damon Wayans went on a tirade this week. A ridiculous and stupid tirade, but a tirade nonetheless. Based on this tirade, I am now thoroughly convinced he is the jackass I always thought he could be. Way to be, Damon Wayans. Way. To. Be.
  • Speaking of royalty, I may be a little late to this party, but is this an actual thing??? I mean… you can’t just claim a kingdom, can you? I know it’s TLC but… it was in the news too. This is just too embarrassing for words. Just… go away, strange heirs. Go. Away.
  • And lastly, for those of you wondering about my personal life now that I have embarked upon this new adventure, this about sums it up:
fridge boyfriend

I really, REALLY need this t-shirt.

Okay, peeps. That’s all I have for this week. Next week, be dears and help a girl out with her headlines, WILL YA? I’m not asking for much. I mean… C’MON.

Over n’ out, good buddies. Have a great week.

Charity Tuesday: Under the Same Sun

Charity Tuesday.

On a Wednesday.

Because yesterday was a teacher workshop day.

And I didn’t plan ahead and schedule a post.

So, we’re doing it today.

But usually it will be on Tuesday.

Just so we’re clear…

Charity Tuesday.

What day? TUESDAY. But instead we’re doing it today because of aforementioned reasons.

Moving on.

For this VERY FIRST INSTALLMENT of Charity TUESDAY, I wanted to talk about the charity “Under the Same Sun”.

Most of you have probably never heard of this charity. I know I hadn’t. That’s probably because we were unaware that albino children in Africa are being hunted for their limbs.

People with albinism lack pigment in their skin, eyes and hair. Traditional African communities view albinism as having mystical powers thought to bring wealth and good luck. Because of this, African albino children are being hunted for body parts which can then be sold for thousands of dollars on the black market to be used in potions. In Tanzania alone, there have been 8 attacks in the past year.

Under the Same Sun is a Canadian charity dedicated to helping those with Albinism overcome deadly discrimination through advocacy and education. “Under The Same Sun (UTSS) is founded on the belief that all persons are created in God’s image and as such are worthy of love, respect and, above all, dignity. While UTSS is active at the UN and globally, much of [their] current focus is on the crisis faced by People With Albinism in Tanzania. [They] have developed offices there with a highly innovative and effective approach to this issue. This is beginning to bring about the societal transformation needed to stop the stigma based attacks and killings. From there, UTSS is reaching across Africa and the world to stimulate a movement that roots out stigma and discrimination by planting the seeds of empowerment for people living with albinism.”

Why this charity and why now? Because of it’s recent relevancy in the news, and because it’s a largely marginalized population without much support or media coverage. How many of you were aware of this issue or this charity? I’m guessing very few. Therefore, I wanted to highlight a worthy cause few have heard of.

If you would like to donate to Under The Same Sun, click here. Under The Same Sun is a Canadian federally-registered charity and is in accordance with The Income Tax Act of Canada. They also have a 501(c)(3) exempt organization in the US known as “Under the Same Sun Foundation (USA)” for their US donors. Furthermore, UTSS is also registered and recognized under The Non-Governmental Organizations Act, 2002 of the United Republic of Tanzania. All funds donated go directly to assist persons with albinism in Tanzania – they are not used for administrative purposes.


For more information, click on one of the following links:



Things That Made Me Go, “Hmm…” – Week 39

First things first:

I HAVE had my coffee. However, yesterday was a particularly maddening day so before we get started with things that made me go “Hmm…” this week, allow me to get this off my chest.

  • My new apartment smells. I thought it was “old apartment smell”. You know, that mix of mildew and mustiness that occasionally accompanies basement apartments? I thought after airing out the place, vacuuming repeatedly and using various air freshening devices the problem might be taken care of. Not so. I didn’t really think much of it until the previous tenant stopped by yesterday to tell me that, “Oh, by the way, that apartment was flooded and that’s why I moved out.”

I’m sorry…. Come again?

Huh. Funny, because the landlord never mentioned ANYTHING ABOUT THAT. Hm… I WONDER WHY. And then it all came rushing back to me. No wonder all the old ladies in the building had been asking me, “Has he replaced that carpet yet?” I thought they were just crotchety old bitties with nothing better to do than complain about old carpets. NOPE. NOT THE CASE.

And then the informant got all nervous and was like, “I’ve been praying and praying about whether or not I should tell you! PLEASE don’t tell him you heard it from me! I’ll get kicked out!”

Um… first of all… no, you won’t you silly, little paranoid fruitcake. There’s these nifty things called “laws” that would prevent that from ever happening. Secondly, you had to pray about telling me this? I mean, I’m a big fan of prayer, but some things are just about common sense and human decency. Isn’t that kind of like asking God if you should warn your neighbors about a serial killer hiding in their closets?

ANYHOODLES… now I have to put on my big girl panties and get all bitchy and be like, “LISTEN HERE, BUB!” and actually confront the dude. Which is not in my nature AT ALL. And honestly, all I want to do is hide underneath the bed until the situation goes away.

UPDATE: I actually called and left a testy voicemail with the guy. And then I accidentally called back and when he answered, I panicked and hung up. Because that’s how I roll.  *sigh*

  • In other news (you know, the kind that actually affects someone other than myself…), this happened this week. And honestly, when I heard about it, I laughed out loud. Because it’s kind of like setting a rabid pitbull loose in a daycare and expecting everything to be fine because before letting him off the leash you pat him on the head and remind him to “be good”.

That’s what I said!

I’m not even being sarcastic. That’s genuinely amazing.

What was that? Oh, you think I should highlight this cause for my Charity Tuesday post too? Oh, you bet your bippy I will…

  • I could comment on the disgusting behavior of two disgusting human beings both of whose names begin with the letter “J”, but I would rather not sully this post by mentioning them or their harrible behavior. So, we’ll just skip it.

I could continue, but it’s rainy today and I’m tired and all the stress of having to call and be angry with the landlord has really worn me out. Sooo… I’m gonna call it a day.

Over n’ out, good buddies. Thanks for reading.

Random Thoughts on a Random Tuesday

Why random thoughts on a random Tuesday? Because I said so, that’s why.

  • This morning, I had my first dentist appointment in THREE YEARS. (Don’t you judge me. I have harrible tooth anxiety. What? That’s a thing. That’s totally a thing.) To say I was concerned was an understatement. I thought they were going to be scraping my teeth for a full five hours and then sending me to an oral specialist for some kind of unknown, unpronounceable mouth thing. Turns out, the scraping only took half an hour and I had no cavities. I know what you’re thinking…


Because it’s exactly what I was thinking too. Although, I did get a short lecture on flossing more. And then I was told that the gum-line near my bicuspids had receded to the point that my roots were exposed… and eventually, I would probably need a skin graft. Which I already knew about… and thus the reason I had been avoiding the dentist for the past three years. But now that I won’t have dental insurance (you know, after having taken my vow of poverty for the Catholic diocese…), I can surely put it off for another year. But eventually, I’m going to have to put on my big girl pants, and just bite the bullet. But not right now. For now, I shall celebrate my mostly healthy, and conspicuously clean mouth.

  • In other news, I know shockingly little about Joseph Stalin. This occurred to me after watching a documentary about him on the History Channel. Did you know he was in power up until the 1950s? And he started all kinds of concentration camps in Russia? WHO KNEW?! I mean, I vaguely remember skimming over him in World History in 11th grade, but otherwise? Yeah, we didn’t really talk about him. It was always Hitler, Hitler, Hitler. Well, what about Stalin? Mussolini? General Mao? Saddam Hussein? HMM??? Shouldn’t they at least be given a footnote in our history books?!

Why should Hitler just get to stomp around like a giant while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? The other ruthless, murderous dictators are just as cute as Hitler, right? The other ruthless, murderous dictators are just as smart as Hitler. People totally like the other ruthless, murderous dictators just as much as they like Hitler, and when did it become okay for Hitler to be the boss of everybody because that’s not what ruthless, murderous dictatorship is about! We should all just stab Hitler!”

Mean Girls? Oh, nevermind. It was stretch anyway. Needless to say,  I will be picking up history books from the library and brushing up on world history. Because… you know… being dumb about stuff is never ideal.

  • I have made a decision that from here on out every Tuesday on this here blog is going to be”Charity Tuesday”. It is here that I will highlight a charity and/or worthy cause worth giving to, promoting, or volunteering time to. And then you guys can take it from there. And retweet it. And repost it. And reblog it. And get other people to care. Because every little bit helps, right? Right. And I’m feeling particularly charitable lately.
  • I have been deplorably lazy with reading other peoples’ blogs lately. I PROMISE I will come around and catch up. There’s really no excuse for my lack of visits. I’m just lazy. And sometimes busy. But mostly, just lazy.


With that being said… I suppose I should finish my laundry. And maybe work on some lesson plans. Maybe brush my teeth again (you know, for good luck or… something).

Catch you on the flip-side, peeps.


Things That Made Me Go, “Hmm…” – Week 38

Alright, kiddos. Ready for this week’s rundown? No? Not quite? Well, get ready, because I’m not gonna wait around for you guys…

  • This happened this week… and it was BRILLIANT. You go, John Brown. And don’t you dare apologize for anything. You did exactly what everyone has been wanting to do for the past 5 years. Bravo, sir. BRAV-O.
  • I came across this harribly lame lovely little snippet this week. It both frightened and enthralled me. I mean… REALLY, Alana Stewart? The woman’s gotta be some kind of alien life-form. That’s just… I mean… Holy Crappers, Batman! I guess I shouldn’t be so concerned about being 30, huh?
  • This also happened this week and it is literally the cutest thing EV-ER (…aside from the stupid rhyming scheme.) Who wrote the copy for this story? A four year old fairy princess?

The whole. Entire. Time. Poor jurors…

Okay, peeps. I realize that’s only four miniscule snippets, but gosh darn it… I’M BUSY. You should be happy I even posted this week. Good grief. The demands from you minions are getting just a wee bit ridiculous don’t you think? No? Well… YOU’RE WRONG. So there.

Lastly, in case you haven’t done this yet…

GO FOLLOW MISS CORA ON BLOGLOVIN’!  Seriously. What are you waiting for? Go do it. Why? Because I said so. And you may think I’m not the boss of you, but we all know I totally am, so… why fight it? Go do it. Thank you, minions.

Over n’ out, good buddies. Have an excellent end to your weekend.


Things That Made Me Go “Hmm…” – Week 37

Um, first of all, let me apologize to all you fans of my weekly “Hmm…” posts. For alas, I have not posted one of these in nearly a month.


My bad.

This is really quite a shame considering the headlines of the past few weeks have been PHENOMENAL (Thanks in no small part to Donald Trump…).

However, there are still plenty of items from which to draw upon for this week’s installment.

Alright? Let’s do this.

(She) had blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her wherever.”

Ahem. I’ll give you a moment to digest that…

After this lovely little tidbit, his campaign issued a statement insisting that he meant to say “whatever” instead of “wherever”. As though saying “Blood coming out of her ‘whatever'” changes the entire meaning of the statement and makes it perfectly acceptable.

His campaign issued another statement insisting that he was referring to her… nose.

I’m sorry… just…

And… that pretty much sums up that story.

I believe the word you’re looking for is, “Ew.”

I suppose that makes me some kind of misogynistic anti-feminist. I didn’t realize there was a shortage of tampons and pads in the world, although it makes sense with regards to developing countries. But if that’s the case, can’t we start some kind of “Period Charity” instead of running around without… stuff? Call me old fashioned but… Ew.

  • This also happened at the GOP debate (Don’t worry, after this little tidbit, I SWEAR I will not refer to the GOP debate and/or politics in this post again.) which was pretty much the highlight of the evening:
  • And for anyone out there currently searching for a job… Don’t stress… Everyone involved knows it’s just a BS waste of time anyway.

What is that… Five stories? Okay, I’m calling it. I could spend all day searching for more, but c’mon… I think we all know that isn’t going to happen. I hope you’re okay with that. If not… Yeah, I don’t really care.

Alrighty. Over n’ out, good buddies. Catch you on the flip side.