Christmas hasn’t even made an appearance at my house people.
She’s MIA. AWOL. Kidnapped. A run away. A no-show. Gone.
Probably because we haven’t really invited her in.
Except for this:
It’s a shame. I’m usually such a Christmas freak. I’m all like, “It’s Christmas, bitches! Let’s celebrate!”
And this year I’m all like, “I have a full plate of subbing jobs, car repairs, divorce papers, gift getting, and health insurance to wade through, bitches! Everybody calm down!”
It doesn’t help that my roommate (aka Mother) is kind of an Eeyore when it comes to celebrations. So, that puts a major damper on things.
Plus, the fact that I have been feeling dizzy and light-headed for the last WEEK doesn’t help things either.
Yes. Dizzy. And light-headed. For a week.
Now before everyone throws up their hands in a panic, all Southern Belle-style and starts wailing and wringing their hands about “Oh, she’s a goner!” understand that I have had bouts of dizziness and minor vertigo in the past. Further understand that I have no other symptoms. Also understand that the dizziness and light-headedness only occurs when I stand up, sit down or otherwise change the position of my head. Please also take into consideration the fact that my sinuses have been clogged like a mo-fo for MONTHS thanks to some mysterious allergy I cannot identify. Also, I have issues with staying hydrated AND I may have gone off my anxiety meds because I knew I could not afford to get them refilled. SO… taking all that into consideration, I’m fairly certain that I have not had a stroke, nor do I have a brain tumor. However, I do not want to go see a doctor for $500 to have them tell me, “Yeah, looks like an inner ear thing. Good luck with that.” So… I’m gonna wait it out. (Why am I telling you this? So you can talk me down from the anxious perch I find myself stranded on thanks to going off my anxiety medication. I talk a good game, but I occasionally freak out on the inside. Go ahead. Tell me I’m fine and prescribe me some herbal remedies. Seriously. Kay. Thanks.)
Wait. Wasn’t I talking about my lack of Christmas? Oh. Yes.
About that… I’m going to go Christmas the crap out of the living room archway with some twinkle lights and garland.