Sugar: You’re doing it wrong.

World Health Organization Lowers Sugar Intake Recommendations

sugarUm, why was I not informed of this? When did this happen? And where was I when it happened? (Probably hiding from my students, stuffing my face full of cake doughnuts in the teachers’ lounge if memory serves…)

The new recommended amount of sugar a woman should consume every day is 25 grams. Or 6 teaspoons.

Um… I guess I’ve been doing it wrong?

6 teaspoons? You’re sure it’s TEASPOONS? Not tablespoons? Maybe you’re confusing teaspoons with cups… That happens to me a lot. Teaspoon, cup… it’s hard to keep straight. Pretty sure you’re talking cups here. Not teaspoons. Cups. It’s okay. Common mistake. Happens to me all the time.

Because honestly, if you’re talking teaspoons, I should have died by now.

You see, my mother and I had gotten into the habit of eatig Oreos (Double Stuf of course) and Mounds Bars and drinking Coca Cola on a daily basis. And maybe we’d throw in a couple of Twizzlers and Chocolate Parfait Nips for good measure. A good time was had by all.

And then my mother turned to me and said, “I wonder what the recommended daily intake of sugar is?”

So, I pull out my phone and I ask “What is the daily recommended intake of sugar?”

Sweet mother of God.

25 grams?

I pulled out the Mounds Bars. “Hm… ”

I pulled out the Oreos. “Huh.”

I pulled out the Twizzlers. “Ahahahaha… ha.”

I pulled out the Nips. “Whaaaa?”

I pulled out the Coke. “WHAT THE WHAT?!”

And then imagine my response when I pulled out the yogurt I thought was healthy and read that label.

Something to the effect of, “@#)$(*&!@#^_)@#$(*&^%$!”

I didn’t even have the guts to add up the amount of sugar we had been consuming. It was probably over 100 grams. When the daily recommended amount is 25.

We should seriously have died a couple weeks ago.

When you start reading labels, it’s amazing how much sugar is in everything. Holy Crappers… It’s everywhere! You can’t escape it. You actually need to make a concerted effort to get it out of your diet.

So, my mother and I stopped eating all that crap. The first few days were torture. All I could think about were Oreos and Mounds Bars. But then, once you start tapering off and get it out of your system, you don’t find yourself missing it as much. Except when you’re on your period and you’re hangry all the time. (You might as well hook an IV of sugar water up to me just to keep me happy.)

I seriously had no idea I was consuming that much sugar. And honestly? I’ve been doing pretty well avoiding it and replacing it with natural sugars from fruit. Except for last night. When I went out to dinner with the girls. 1 and a half glasses of Coke and the largest slice of Lemon Cream Cake I have ever seen in my life later, I’m pretty sure I failed. And last week, when the craft fair was selling Kettle Corn and Funnel Cakes? Well, it wasn’t my finest moment. But at least I’m trying.

25 grams, huh? If I hadn’t confirmed it with multiple sources, I would’ve thought CBS News was pulling my leg.

25 grams. Clearly I was doing it wrong.

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